Wants Vs Needs

We live in a country mostly of surplus of temptation, reinforcement, and instant gratification.  This can be deceiving for us because it gives us a false sense of security with material objects and false pretenses.  This security is what we learn to turn to as a coping skill in times of turmoil or trauma which triggers the old question of wants versus needs.  I learn in therapy clients get comfortable with giving themselves what they want maybe even from an early age in life.

Many times, individuals choose what they want but is it best for their needs?  If we constantly reinforce what we want is it the healthiest choice for us we can lose control of the intake or surplus.  Losing control of giving yourself what you want when you want it can lead to many impulse behavior and relationship problems.  Giving ourselves what we want over long periods of time can influence how we work, relationship, and parent which could be major barriers to growth.  We always desire outcomes to be guided in our favor, so we begin to control and obsess over giving ourselves what we want thinking it is the right choice.  For example, substance use, shopping, and gambling are behaviors that may start out as innocent, but it feels good to give ourselves what we want and eventually lose control.

Accountability allows for us to make choices we normally would not make for ourselves but it also may be the right or healthy choice.  Having a place of employment, boss, or relationship in your life that holds you accountable can assist you in growing in areas in your life you may not be able to grow yourself because of freedom of always making the want choice versus need choice. Accountability may be something we don’t want in our life and think it is something we do not need but it can be an enormous path to healthy identity and growth.  At Emotion Station we assist people in controlling wants versus needs and determining healthy boundaries of how to keep control of wants so they do not create turmoil in our life.  Contact us today at 239-317-3115 to get your journey started.