Honesty

Dealing with relationships in a therapeutic setting it is common that clients look to repair relationships current or past.  Emotion Station believes that an enormous part of repairing a relationship is raising trust levels.  Raising trust levels can decrease skepticism others have toward us which if we are not honest they have a right to carry that. A good step toward raising trust levels is being honest.  Honesty is a critical component of healthy relationships and people avoid honesty out of fear, desire for acceptance, or embarrassment.  When investigating honesty in a therapeutic setting we look at honesty with ourselves and honesty with others.

Honesty with ourselves is essential in understanding our identity.  Honesty with ourselves includes being true to our morals, values, and the ability to be consistent.  Being true to our morals and values allows for an individual to be authentic.  Authenticity in a person has a positive effect on one’s emotions and the other people around them.  When we are true and honest it helps us feel lighter and stabilizes a positive emotional place.  Other people feel that positive energy and desire to surround themselves with people that make them feel good.  Authenticity builds respect in relationships.  Being consistent is also important in achieving honesty in relationships.  A great example of consistency is to ask the famous question Am I a hypocrite?  Hypocrite behaviors consist of saying one thing, doing another and judging others negatively for some of the same things we do.  Saying one thing and doing another leads to low credibility and possibly a damaged reputation.  Judging others leads to a sense of entitlement which hinders growth and development.

Honesty with others includes keeping nothing buried and avoiding people pleasing to gain acceptance.  Keeping nothing buried includes secrets or any skeletons in the closet.  Often people are not honest with others because they do not want to hurt anyone.  Relationships are damaged more from secrets and surprises than being honest and telling someone something they may not want to hear.  If we are honest it could soften the blow and build respect in the relationship.  People pleasing can be exhausting and leads us to stray from our identity.  As humans we like to be accepted by others and waver from who we are to impress.  Healthy relationships respect boundaries and we should not have to prove we are worthy of fitting in.  Honesty with other people also effects our emotions in a positive manner and as mentioned earlier and allows us to feel lighter without guilt.